This iPhone requires you to key in the Password to unlock
"0000". So much for a password.
No Miss Calls. Well, that ain't no surprise now, is it?
WhatsApp: *no messages*
Viber: *no messages*
Skype: *no messages* / *no miss calls*
I wonder; if I went missing last night, would anyone have noticed?
Tossing it at the side of the bed, I scrambled to my feet, dragging myself out of the red silky soft bed linen which was wrapped around my body the past night. I headed straight for the bathroom with my towel thrown around my neck and came to realize that I was clothed only in my tank top and bikini underwear.
I suppose that's the pros for waking up early. Everyone else is still asleep!
Upon locking the bathroom door, I stripped naked and threw myself into an hour long hot shower. There is nothing in the world that cannot be fixed with a hot shower gushing on your head, flowing down your shoulders, the heat massaging the pelvis and finally moisturising the feet. Especially, after a long well deserved 9 hour sleep, it would seem as if paradise found its way back to Earth and it's here in the very comfort of your home. It was just then I remembered my prearranged meeting with Rizwans' house mate - Uddin.
My heart skipped a beat thinking about it. Not only have I been sloughing through the past 5 weeks with my nose buried in my books, but this week in particular has been the toughest ever. The 3 centralised papers which I re-sat for was far beyond manageable. I knew for a fact that was not my best performance, despite much consolences from fellow mates. When I walked out of that exam hall, I knew I was not going to be a certified Barrister, at least not for the year 2014. My heart dreaded thinking about it and my shoulders felt heavy at once. I wanted to speak to someone about how I felt and just fret about it without any questions about my future and without any condolences. I wanted to speak to a friend. Uddin was at the right place and the right time - or so I thought.
I was the only one, in my circle of friends, whom had papers to repeat. After the main examination, almost everyone headed home; back to their respective countries. Hence, after my resit examinations, I had no one to "celebrate" with. My only resort was Kartheek and since he seemed to be occupied with his mates in London, I resorted to the next best available: Uddin.
I dressed up in a jiffy and dropped him a message confirming the time to meet up. I headed downstairs to a cup of coffee. The one and only way to kick start my day: a cup of hot strong coffee accompanied with a stick of Marlboro Light cigarette. I raced back up with the cup in one hand and a bottle of water in the other, hoping to have had a reply by now.
WhatsApp: *no messages*
Apparently, the message that I sent has not been read either. I decided to give him a call if I do not receive a reply once I'm done with my morning prayer. Just as I was about to tap my cigarette off, the phone rings.
"Hello?"
"Mmmm....morning!", Uddin exclaims between yawns.
"Hey, morning. What time do you want me to come over?"
"Anytime. Are you ready?"
"Yes!", I quickly jumped, feeling like a foolish schoolgirl having a crush on a senior.
"Haha...then come over! I'm sorry I can't pick you up because my car's under repair".
"No...no...that's fine, really. Hey, I need to speak to you about something important. Something I've been wanting to talk to someone about. It may be a little depressing, though. Are you fine with that?"
"Don't worry, that's fine. Just come over. Give the door a knock when you're here. I'll come down".
Excitement overcame my senses. I finally have someone to spend time with, someone to talk to, someone to smoke weed with. This is going to be a start of something new and fun. I finally found a friend.
I got off the bus at the stop opposite Lick n' Chicken. It is literally a 3 minute walk from there to his house. Upon reaching, I could see that he was anxiously waiting at the door for me. The sight of me instantaneously carved a wide, bright ear-to-ear smile on his face. I responded with a huge wave of my arms, slapping myself for an immature childish reaction. He chuckled as I strode past him into house. We headed straight for his room and I could see that he had already made the atmosphere ready for a smoking up session. The speakers were plugged to the laptop, songs were carefully selected in his playlist, roll ups, filters and a grinder spread across the bed. The bed stand had some bananas, a juice box, an unopened packet of muffins and a half-completed meal plate on it. The sound of the door creaking disrupted my investigative mind.
"Look what I've got!"
He had 3 bags of weed. 2 for me to take home and one for us to smoke now. I cheekily smiled and clapped, giving a sheepish "Yay!". I wish I would not do that. I wasted no time and started grinding away one bag as he prepared its roach. I then took the nearest hard paper and tossed the ground leaves with tobacco - mixing them proportionately so that the smoking period of a joint lasts longer. As I was almost satisfied with my work of art, I stripped a filter paper off its holder and distributed the mixture reciprocally on it and delicately handed it to the expert to have his final touch. He gingerly placed the roach at one end, stuck the first side down and immediately started rolling it into a joint. The last lick on the sticky side locked the magic in and voila!: A Knee Trembler.
The sudden random surge of excitement which I have been encountering the past week is inevitable. I can safely come to the conclusion that it could possibly be the ripple effect of those nerve wrecking papers I sat for few days back which crushed my childhood dreams. Seeing how Uddin managed the roll a joint so smoothly and effortlessly was as good as having the Master of Green Perfection himself in front of my very eyes - and that got me excited. A smiled carved across my skin peeling cheeks as I instantly snatched the joint, desperately craving to feed the tobacco/weed hunger that had been kept on hold for the past 2 months or so. I rummaged through his drawers, fishing for any lighters that I could find when I felt a soft pat on my shoulders signalling me to turn around.
"Is this what you're searching for?"
Uddin had a sort of sixth sense when it came to me. In one way or another, he would always know what I was thinking at a particular time or what I was feeling when I reacted in a certain way and had an idea of my needs and will provide me just that. It seemed like if I had brain tumour and I could not think for the rest of my life, I am reassured that Uddin would be the perfect candidate to run my life on behalf of me. The decisions for my life which he would make will be reflecting mine.
A few minutes into our solemn ritual, we were head banging to the hand picked selected songs. They were good choices - a mix of ballad, rock pop and contemporary. Every now and then, our views crossed and we would unknowingly immaturely blush.
"So, what is it that you wanted to talk to me about, Jane?" his question broke the awkward silence we were having. Well, at least someone had the guts to kick off the conversation!
"Oh yes, I almost forgot..Well, it's like this. I did really bad in these papers I sat for and from the looks of it, I'm really uncertain of my Barrister dream any more"
At this point, he moved his position from the computer chair and rested himself on the bed, next to me.
"Hey, listen now. Don't worry. You gave it your best and I prayed for your success. Believe me, Jane when I say this: I've not prayed for anyone, not even myself, this hard in my entire life. So, I know Allah will help you because I've asked him to". He looked right into my eyes as he uttered those words, ensuring that I understand how serious he was in matters concerning me.
I gave a corporate smile and replied him, "Okay, Uddin. Thank you for praying for me and yes I did my best. I'm just worried that's all, you know".
He nodded his head in the attempt of securing my feelings and showing that he completely comprehends my situation, but continues gazing into my eyes, now deeper than earlier. His upper body moved closer to mine and his head stretched out as his lips raced for mine, and they met.
Do you remember your first experience of consuming cotton candy? The softness of that fluffy untainted pink cotton simply melts in your mouth, giving you a rush of sweetness and excitement ultimately ends up with you begging for more - that's exactly how I felt when I kissed him.
I couldn't - No, I didn't want it to stop. I wanted to savour that sweetness and the excitement to continue intriguing my senses until reality kicked in and Kartheek's image appeared in my mind. I pushed him away at once and turned away from him and he did the same, distraughtly shaking his head. I stood up and rested my back against the wall trying to make sense what just took place. He understood that I was not too keen to be there any more and got off the bed and headed for the door,
"Shall we?"
I was caught off guard and acted solely based on my instincts? Lust? Loneliness? Affection? Attention? Whatever it was that I acted on that day does not change what happened next. I wrapped my fingers around his left wrist and pulled his body towards mine. My hands grasped his hips to rest on mine against the wall, as I cupped his face and locked his lips with mine. His hands held my body close to his, in disbelief of my actions yet in love with it. It was addictive - his kiss , his lips, his tongue, his softness, his warmth, that untainted taste, that sweetness melting so effortlessly and unexpectedly - all of it was unbelievably addictive! I was addicted to him and I didn't want it to stop, but the scariest part was: it felt so wrong but so right.
"There is nothing either good or bad but thinking makes it so." William Shakespeare
