Something died in me today. Something undefiled and gullible had been reduced to ashes.
I had faith; a faith that mankind had a precious gift whereby it connected each other in a beautiful relationship. Be it friendship, workmates, familial to strangers we meet today, we had a God given bond that brought us all together if only tapped into and willingly consenting vice versa. When bonded in that connection it somehow brought us a step closer to our individual purpose and elevating ourselves closer to our Creator.
"I have to leave anyways. I did not plan anything for tonight but they are insisting for me to be there as the CEO is attending. Our session was great by the way - no regrets"
"I am going nuts here - why aren't you answering my calls? Are you with him? Never talk to me again, Jane"
"It was all my fault Jane. I did it all because of ego. I knew you will become a success in everything you do and I know it was not going to be easy for me. So I couldn't continue this friendship anymore. Trust me it was as hard for me as it was for you"
"I haven't felt this for the longest time and I am so happy. My parents have arranged my marriage, will you be alright if I agreed?"
"Why are you being so ungrateful? Just forget the money she took from you and start anew relationship with my niece"
"If you can arrange the RM30,000 by morning the car is yours. Otherwise, I'll need to go with the buyer your sister has arranged for me"
"Why are you being so sensitive? It's business"
Do you need more evidence? Looking back, numerous incidences took place. Majority were strength building experiences which the thought of it make my eyebrows frown, handful were happy, truly happy experiences till date still consign to oblivion. Throughout these times, there were constants and there were variables - allow me to explain.
We were taught to place importance on fellow brethren than materialistic objects which does not add value to your life. You only find the truth when you are out on the battlefield - struggling to breathe and using every ounce of remaining energy to find the nearest handle to hold on to avoid being stampeded by the crowd. Every person you met was another opportunity to substantiate that faith and when you get slammed down, drag yourself up, dust off and try again.
'That was a bad experience - better days ahead'
'He's a jerk - no wonder he's a loser'
'She is so immature, I'm sure I can find better friends'
'She is a thief. There are others out there who'd value me for who I am'
Convincing yourself it was an isolated incident you allow yourself to be punched, slapped, thrashed over and over again till you are in the present moment and like an overused battery, your bar of faith is running dry. It suddenly dawns on you that humans are in fact, replaceable. The variables were people who walked in and out of your life leaving scars and destroying your innocence which actually depreciated your value as a human being. The constants, surprisingly was the house you live in, your dog, laptop, your bright yellow Myvi, and everything existing around you that does not have a conscience which in fact, appreciated your value as a human being.
Now, you ask: should you build relationship with human beings or materialistic beings? Life is an experiment; tests that we subconsciously exercise on each other to see whether one falls as a constant without conscience or a variable with. So, which are you?
I will never apologize for saying that the future of humanity and the future of the world is going to be defined by what we have in common as opposed to those things that separate us and ultimately lead us into conflict - Barack Obama
