Is my tank full? Prolly I need to pee. Wait, I didn't have dinner. Am I hungry? Maybe I need to take a break. My fingers are aching, I feel my body aching and getting heavier. Eminem's Lose Yourself is ringing at the back of my mind. The ghost from the past is haunting again, erupting old regretful, spiteful emotions. Images of chairs thrown against the wall and endless days of tears and sadness to balls of hair being forced out into thin air. Blank sheets of paper lay beside me, with words scribbled all over and a pen left idle on top of the stack. It seems to me like a collection of sheets of contagious disease that I'm trying not to even look at. Because if I do, I will be infected.
Locking myself into this 4 wall chamber, is getting at me now. Not enough of the physical prison I've imposed myself into, invasion of privacy is stealing the bits of consciousness left in me. I dread looking at stationery. I wail at the sight of books. I sob at the thought of studying. I just want to run. Runaway, from beings, lies, back to yesterday, save tonight...I feel the sun creeping out like tik tok, I'm trying to keep you in my head but if not, just keep running from tomorrow as our lips lock...DAMN! SEE? A rhythm for every worry, a song for every problem, a voice of melody embraces the negative thoughts....when it shouldn't!
Munching my way around Kit Kat Chunky, the sweetness of the milky chocolate takes me to this paradise of endless joy and contentment. The sound of the packet opening, intrigues me to want more. I want more of you....more...more....and more. Till the last bite and the milky chocolate that tastes like paradise, dissolves in my mouth, that last excitement, brings me back to earth, to this same rotten 4 wall chamber, finding my way through the contagious disease. Should I avoid it like how I've always been doing, or embrace it to be infected and survive the consequences?
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